Happy 2008!!!!

"Change and growth take place when a person has risked himself and dares to become involved with experimenting with his own life."
--- Herbert Otto

Hello! First, obviously this monthly newsletter has turned out to be more like a quarterly! I can't explain why exactly I have been hesitant to write, but the urge has struck and manifested here.

Thank you for reading this, giving me the forum to express my thoughts.

I have been going through so much personal change, growth and development over the past month and a half or so. It has been scary and exhilarating all at the same time. I completed a yoga teacher training with the most amazing, loving, kind and talented teacher, Erich Schiffman in early December. Then, I embarked on possibly the most challenging adventure of my life . . . a ten day completely SILENT meditation course. I was using the word "retreat" but it was not that type of program in the typical sense where you went, chilled, relaxed, did yoga and came home completely refreshed and blissful. I did come home blissful, but underwent amazing transformation at a very deep level . . . it was much more work than a facial and a massage, but so much more rewarding! It is difficult to explain something like this as it is truly an experiential undertaking. However, I can share some insights that occurred to me during my ten day journey.

First, and probably most pertinent to my career I realize that for the past 15 years or so I have been living life literally trapped in my body. During this time I have fostered an environment, much like a culture in a lab, where negative thoughts about my body and harmful practices were allowed to fester, grow, accumulate and remain. And although, over the years, I have done much to undo such abuse, many things which I have consistently preached to students ("Love your body", "don't be concerned about size ...be concerned about health", "it's about the journey", "things change"... the list goes on and on, right?) I now realize that all these positive affirmations and inspirational messages were band aids. Yes, they did make me feel better (sometimes) and helped me to begin to understand my unhealthy views. Yes, they did bring temporary peace. But my insecurities, somewhat warped ideas of self-love, and pain were and are buried so deep, no amount of preaching or happy thoughts could really uncover and release these. I never knew how a deep sense of peace, love and happiness truly FELT. Now I do. I have never experienced such a deeply rooted sense of love and joy for which no OUTSIDE SOURCE. . . be it a mantra, a dress size, a picture of myself which I deemed "beautiful", whatever, was responsible. I can truly say I now know what it means to be LIBERATED and free from the shackles of my physical body. And let me tell you . . .it is thrilling and exhilarating and the most wonderful sensation I have ever experienced. I am not sure that all woman have been enslaved such as I have (one of my girlfriends is so happy for me. She has witnessed my struggles and has always wanted this for me, as she is a woman who is and has ALWAYS been TRULY comfortable in her skin) but I would be willing to bet many of us are.
I don't want you thinking that the messages I've sent to you and the advice I have given to many of you are invalid or that they didn't come from an honest place, or that I am some big phony and scam! At the time, I truly believed all my advice to be true and I still do. However, what I used to believe to be true in my head, I now KNOW to be true in my heart, as I have felt it. There is such a difference in intellectualizing positivity and physically EXPERIENCING such feelings at your core. I wish for all of you the joy, peace and true love I have experienced. It is a wonderful liberation.

I wish I could feel as amazing as I did when I left my meditation program. It has been a challenge to maintain the practice here at home with distractions and well, life, going on. But I am doing my best to maintain that sense of peace and balance within myself. I am so enjoying my exercise, from a totally different perspective whether it be dance, yoga, Pilates, or just running on the treadmill. There is a joy in my movement as I now feel every sensation that arises in my body and so blessed to be able to express myself through my body. It is a true gift. And my teaching has been elevated to a whole other level. I hope to share that with all of you soon.

If you would like to learn more about the meditation technique that guided me through such powerful transformation, visit http://www.dhamma.org
SPREAD THE LOVE!!!!


Fitness Tip: Feel Your Body
Instead of moving blindly through your workouts, really tune in and experience what it feels like to move. Are there particular sensations you are feeling? Pain? That's a message to ease up. Excitement? Continue on! Consider your half hour or hour of exercise a mini-journey and see where your body takes you. If that means doing something that the instructor doesn't necessarily cue or a workout you didn't 'plan', go for it!!! Therein lies the joy of fitness and exploring your body. It's like opening a box of Cracker Jacks with the anticipation of the prize inside! You have a new body every day. Explore the possibilities!


What's New:
So much, so much, so much.

MOST EXCITING has to be the development of my own brand and series of DVDs in the works under the title of "LivSATTVA"! I will be revealing much more as the months go on, but I am so excited to embark on this adventure and spread my message and new workouts! Keep your eyes open for a new website, newsletter, blog, online support, nutrition guides and much much more!

I should have my shopping cart up on this site by the end of the month to purchase signed copies of dvd and everything will be payable through PayPal.

I recently shot a workout series called PLYOMIX with Ultimate Fighting Champion MATT HUGHES. These are NOT your regular workouts and highlight me teaching a style with which most of you are probably not familiar!!!! I am kicking, punching, squating, high-kneeing and crunching my way through workouts. It's a kick butt, sure fire way to jump start a fitness program in the NEW YEAR.

Check out a sample at:

You can buy yours by clicking on the Buy button above.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed working on this project.